where is the line?

I’m thankful I was able to run with + support someone who means a whole lot to me today. I have been coaching Beth for the last few months and she never ceases to amaze me.
A “kind-hearted badass” with an incredible mindset, Beth is a dear friend to all as well as a determined and passionate leader. She stepped up and stuck to her training while also opening a new biz with her husband Kevin in downtown Raleigh and working another job simultaneously.
We had a LOT to celebrate today. Her first big goal race of the year got cancelled, but today she showed up and ran it anyway because that is what felt right to her. Kevin mapped out a loop she and two friends could do 5 times, and had music, cowbells and water bottles waiting for them each time they came through. It was awesome! When they crossed the chalk-drawn finish, they were given handmade medals. Beth rocked her goal of breaking 2 hours and finished in 1:55! ❤️👊🏻💥
Here’s the thing, though: I debated whether or not to go. This virus outbreak has me feeling all sorts of anxiety and uncertainty about simple choices that are usually so obvious to me. I feel strongly that I need to be even MORE careful as I do my part to stop its aggressive spread. Ultimately I decided it was such a small group (I mean, the grocery store is more dangerous, I think?) and that I would be mindful and careful. And I was! But then I put my arm around Beth for this happy photo which I LOVE but also makes me wonder was that irresponsible? Was taking a picture like this irresponsible right now? This is the world we are living in at the moment….
I wonder now … was that foolish? Where is the line and is it possible to avoid crossing it before it’s too late?

I’m not beating myself up over it, but I do want to share because:

1. This taught me it might not be realistic to still think we can get together to run, even in small groups, and NOT wind up taking risks unintentionally that put others potentially in vulnerable positions, and
2. We make mistakes! Humans are great at that. The mistake thing, I mean. Most of us are trying our best, I believe, but without super-clear guidelines – and guidelines that are changing day by day – and with something so new and so crazy, it’s sometimes hard to know what’s best. Restaurants and stores are still open, studios are still having small classes, etc… it’s confusing to me and I think to many others.
After the run, I realized no matter what anyone else thinks, I felt like I made a mistake. As much as I so badly want to run with my friends right now and support my athletes in person whenever I can, this doesn’t feel like what’s best for the GREATER GOOD at the moment.
And that matters a whole lot.
We will get there. Let’s hang on and keep moving forward doing what we truly feel is best. I think, pray, hope and BELIEVE that the more closely we are able to adhere to the #socialdistancing and #stayhome mindset, the sooner these things won’t be necessary anymore. ❤️ I will run alone for a bit, and connect more with others online and over the phone for now.
What do you think? How are you feeling?

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Hi, I'm Jess!

Thanks for visiting my blog! I’m a runner, a coach, and an artist whose work’s purpose is to celebrate and encourage others on the run. I started running over 20 years ago when I signed up for my first marathon, and since then it has become an integral part of me and how I live my life. Running changed me in ways I never could have imagined, and has continued to lead me down a path of personal and professional growth and self discovery. On this blog I love sharing stories about my journey, talking about the lessons I’ve learned along the way and connecting with all of you. Thank you for being here!

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